Wednesday, July 10, 2024
Reality Hits
Tuesday, July 09, 2024
Another Night
After an enriching weekend with family, I am here again, battling another grief attack.
You might ask, What is a grief attack? It is something that I equate to a panic attack..
Friday, July 05, 2024
Battery Charged
After working on-site yesterday, I picked up Mama, Kara, and (surprise surprise!) Papa. We drove to Bunso's place, stopped at Shell SLEx for late lunch at KFC and Starbucks courtesy of Papa. Since then, I've felt recharged. Family has been my source of strength when my dark days began.
Here, I am able to sleep soundly without the hassle of being woken to switch parking places and enjoy the company of my nieces. Next to Marikina, this is my peaceful place, and so I long to be here as much as possible.
Tomorrow is the last day of the work week for me, and I am looking forward to spending quality time with family before heading back to the metro.
Thank God for family and peaceful places.
💖
Wednesday, July 03, 2024
Begin Again?
Wednesday, July 3, 2024
More than two years from my last entry huh? That long? Geez! And I am here again, finally recalled how to access this page. The last two years, I can say that I just went through the motions of life. Gave the 'bare minimum'. Just existed.
Ugh 2022.
If it weren't for the birth of Bebe Gic and Taba's miraculous recovery, I truly, truly wish that it had just not happened. I still think of it as a nightmarish year of my life - battling depression, Taba getting terribly sick, my nearly fatal heart attack, and the worst - losing Bunsita. 💔ðŸ˜
I was never the same after October 18 that year. I knew now how it felt to have a part of you DIE when we lost her. Fuck! The aftermath? Grief attacks. When it happens, I feel like drowning. That, no tears are enough to cry out the pain that resurfaces. It's like a big gash that's been stitched and then the stitches are pulled forcefully.
May be going back to this page will help with my grief journey.
May be I'll find solace in creating entries that bare myself.
I don't know.